


Fix everything

by Lyrene, tonkshamsandwich



Category: Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (TV 2016)
Genre: Brotzly - Freeform, Dirk/Dirk, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-31
Updated: 2017-03-31
Packaged: 2018-10-13 06:12:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,302
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10507908
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lyrene/pseuds/Lyrene, https://archiveofourown.org/users/tonkshamsandwich/pseuds/tonkshamsandwich
Summary: But Dirk had an advantage. He knew what would happen with past-him during the week. He knew exactly what moment he had to change - Todd couldn't see Dirk's meeting with his past-self, and Dirk had to try to give his past-self a little bit more information.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * A translation of [Fix Everything](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/280980) by Lyrene. 



> Thanks to my dear co-author who helped to translate the story from russian.  
> Written on Dirk-selfcest request, so you'll find a bit of Dirk/Dirk. But mainly it is Brotzly. Hope you'll like it =)

He really would like to fix everything. But he felt how the stream of creation inexorably led him to the moment which would ruin the most precious thing that had happened to him in the last few years. He could remember it perfectly. After all, he had been there. Not understanding anything yet, shocked, frustrated, yet ready to act immediately, hoping for success and believing only in himself and his hunches. Those unclear, hard to understand, harder to get right hunches.

But now he had an advantage. He knew what would happen with past-him during the week. He knew exactly what moment he had to change - Todd couldn't see Dirk's meeting with his past-self, and Dirk had to try to give his past-self a little bit more information.

He thought it over once more. Wasn’t it too risky? Would it put his past-self in some danger, if he changed things that had already happened to him? Maybe it would cause a paradox, and then what? But... on the other hand there was his Todd. Wonderful Todd, his friend, the friend that Dirk had longed for for so long. Should Dirk take these risks just so that Todd would stay with him? Obviously he should. Because - and it wasn't just a hunch - Todd would never forgive him if he knew how exactly it was that Dirk had known about him, and why he had drawn him into the investigation, whirling him away from his life, which had been smashed into pieces by the hurricane of chaos that seemed to follow Dirk wherever he went. 

Now he had to hurry up. And lie to Todd again. And hope that he would never come to know of it. Dirk already had the gorilla mask under his jacket - attention: Universe, now Dirk was choosing what to do! 

"Todd, according to my hunch, we have to hurry up, so we can be in place before anyone comes. We can't waste time!" he said confidently. Todd nodded in agreement before they were interrupted by a voice coming from the pathway. "Hey, is someone back there?” It was a zoo worker. “Hello? Anyone there?" Dirk and Todd looked at each other in panic before Todd jumped out with his giraffe mask on, brandishing the crossbow, and started to yell about time-traveling detectives. It worked - now they had a car to drive to the hotel in. 

Dirk hastily reconsidered all possible further actions. His main goal was to meet past-Dirk without Todd being present. He couldn't afford not to meet past-Dirk at all, because in that case Dirk would never meet Todd at all, thus creating a paradox, but if Todd found out why they met in the first place, he may never forgive Dirk. Todd drove the car, his eyes wide, excitedly rambling about how he finally understood everything and how everything was actually connected. Dirk absently answered him, thinking Todd couldn’t even begin to imagine how exactly it was all connected. Hopefully he'd never know it. In his mind he rewound all actions of his past-self: the kitten(shark), the penthouse hall, stairs. 19th floor. Todd! That moment where Dirk met him for the first time, and also his other-self. Then stairs again, hall, Dirk's room. It hadn’t good that he had awoken so late that day, but right now he was sure past-him was still in the room, if everything was happening exactly as he remembered. 

Todd swerved the car into place by the hotel and slammed the brakes so hard that some booklets and other papers dropped down onto his knees. Dirk turned to face his friend. "Listen, before we go into the hotel, now is the time for us to take a moment, and think, really think about how we're going to do this." It was clear Todd now was so excited that he could barely think, and Dirk tried to use this to convince him. "We have a unique opportunity here, and we need to be careful how we use it!"

Todd interrupted. "I didn't get up to the penthouse until after 10:00-" both looked at the clock; it was 9:36 "-so if we're gonna do this, we have to go right now."

Dirk wasn't going to argue, but how could he make Todd agree to part with Dirk for a while?

At that moment Todd noticed that nestled amongst the other papers was a lottery ticket. The exact same one that Amanda had ripped up. It surprised Todd so much that he looked like he forgot what was he going to do. Dirk hastily put on his gorilla mask on as a hat, and tried to grab Todd's attention. "Todd, never mind, you were right. There's no time for this!"

They entered the hotel through a service entrance discussing how to get in the penthouse, fortunately hidden from the view of Rimmer and company. Todd mentioned the master key - it was supposed to be in the office. Dirk seized the opportunity to part company. "Great! Todd, you run for the master key! Let's separate for a while, just in case. Do your best to not get caught. Use the stairs, the others will probably use the lifts".

"Dirk, what about you? Where are you going?" Todd turned back to look at him.

"Put the mask on! Let's meet on the stairs to the penthouse. Come on, do it quickly!" Dirk rushed to the stairs hoping Todd wouldn't follow him or ask him any more questions. He checked briefly behind him and saw Todd running in the opposite direction, to his immense relief.

If he hurried up, he'd have about five minutes to talk with his past-self. Dirk walked upstairs - his room was on the 17 floor. Clever Dirk, renting a room in the same hotel where Spring was killed. What if he woke up at the right time this time... But who knew what would happen then - maybe from the Universe’s point of view Dirk had to wake up too late.

Up he went, floor by floor. Dirk could remember the meeting perfectly. His blue jacket, hair a mess, cheekbone scratched, fire in his eyes - well, that was probably what he looked like now. Asking him what was happening - he already knew that it must have been a time-traveling thing, but what exactly? Future-Dirk was a little bit different from him, and Dirk had wondered a lot about how many months or maybe even years had passed before he came to be like that future-Dirk. He would have liked to ask his future-self so many questions, but there had been no time for it. Now he should do as future-Dirk had done, because Dirk always totally trusted himself, even if it was his future-self and not himself-right-now. 

Though future-Dirk had answered one of his questions. About Todd, who had seemed so strange and had looked at Dirk so darkly, that Dirk had preferred to know about him in advance, so that maybe he could avoid some mistakes in the future.

The twelfth floor. Dirk stopped for a while to catch his breath, resting his hands on his knees. Oh no, he never could have thought that the moody guy in a fur coat would be his best friend. Well, to be fair, he hadn’t thought that he would get any sort of friend at all. Up the stairs, five more floors to climb; Todd had probably already gotten hold of the master key so Dirk had to hurry up.

Striding up the stairs, he remembered with a smile his first meeting with Todd. He had been hard to befriend, but Dirk hadn’t given up - he had known that he could do it, because he had seen it. Although, Dirk hadn’t known how much time it would take, but he couldn’t have imagined that between him and future-Dirk only one week had passed. Sometimes a few days could change you more than a few years. And that had happened to Dirk.

The seventeenth floor. He looked around a half-opened door - there was no one in the corridor. He took the gorilla mask off his head. Now, quickly to room 1725, and knock on the door, a little bit louder, because now past-Dirk was sleeping, but the sound should… "Yes? Who's there?" It was so strange to hear his voice, but not from himself. "Pizza delivery for Dirk Gently!" If he knew himself - and he did - Dirk would...

The door opened. "As far as I can remember, I didn't...", Dirk pushed past-him into the room, came in, slammed the door behind him and leaned against it. He noticed past-him’s big, surprised eyes, but Todd's were bigger. "W-what's happening?"

Dirk grinned. "Everything’s alright. It's me. I mean, it's you. From the future, a week from now. We only have five minutes, and I have to tell you something very important".

Past-Dirk stared at him a little bit askance "Just one week? But you look so... different?" He watched Dirk with slightly narrowed eyes and a tilted head. He hesitantly reached for his hand. "May I? Or it will cause some sort of paradox, and start much bigger chaos?"

"Yes you may", said Dirk with certainty, because a week ago, when future-Dirk had touched him, pressed him to the wall, nothing bad had happened. So he reached out his hand too, like a mirror. Hands clasped. Two Dirks gazed into each other's eyes once more.

"You look..." past-Dirk raised his eyebrow and smiled with the left side of his mouth, shrugging slightly, "...so attractive", he finished with a slightly deeper voice. Dirk stepped closer to him, hugged him around his shoulders, and mimicked his intonation, "And you look like you are... flirting with me". His laughing eyes were so close. It was so easy to deal with himself - as hard as dealing with anyone else. Past-Dirk's hands moved under his jacket and joined together behind his back.

"Flirting? Am I?" Well, considering a week ago, Dirk had been in terrible need of cuddling and kissing and so on... but he had noticed it only when he met Todd. Or maybe it was because of Dirk himself that - well, why not?

"You look so handsome when you’re smiling", whispered Dirk, realising that he was now not going to be able to do what he came for. But what of it? He probably would never have a chance to do this again. Dirk didn't like to miss an opportunity to do something really interesting.

"Do we really have only five minutes?" Past-Dirk slightly tilted his head in order to avoid a collision with Dirk's identical nose.

"Unfortunately", Dirk breathed out before their lips met in a kiss.

How he would like to deal with Todd as easily as with himself! Dirk tried to imagine Todd kissing him this way: insatiably, pulling him closer and closer, pressing with his hips... oh, why did they have to have just five minutes? They needed more. But...

"Dirk." He really had to tell him some important things.

"Please don't stop...", whispered past-Dirk, slowly opening eyes framed with long curved eyelashes. 

"Sorry, Dirk, but it really is very important for us." He led past-Dirk to the bed and they sat down, still touching each other, still cuddling. But they had a lot to talk about.

"You are me, so you know what I feel", said past-Dirk sadly. "I do, that's why I came to you. Listen, you won't be so madly and despairingly alone anymore, as you are now, as I was then. Because today you'll meet a person who will become your best friend.” At seeing the shocked, hopeful look on past-him’s face, Dirk laughed. “It's true, he will. He has become my best friend." Past-Dirk listened with rapt attention.

"What is he like?" The question confused Dirk a little, and after a short pause he answered.

"He is... complicated. Clever, unhappy, lonely. He is touchy, but easily calms down. Pretty closed off, and doesn't believe in himself at all. He is reliable, although he doesn't think so. In the face of danger he thinks fast and acts fast. He is... Beautiful." Dirk sighed. Somewhere upstairs his clever and closed off friend was standing and swearing, wondering where Dirk was.

"How much not-lonely do you feel with him?" asked past-Dirk, smiling sadly. "Are you... very close to each other?"

"Well, we met just a week ago, you know! But I’m feeling positive about it", Dirk grinned encouragingly, but deep in his heart he knew that he had no answer. But past-Dirk grinned back.

"Right. How will I meet him?" Oh, now this face Dirk knew - totally concentrated and ready to take in and process information. Perfect.

"His name is Todd Brotzman. He's at the Ridgely Building, and you'll find him there tonight." With these words Dirk laid other-Dirk back on the bed and kissed him again. "Good luck to you, it's time to go, I really must go right now." Past-Dirk looked at him from the bed with an unreadable expression.

"So sad that you can't just stay with me. We could be together..." he sadly smiled again.

"Oh Dirk. You have always got yourself." And it was true. That was always true. He always had himself. That was something already, wasn't it?

"Wait! One last question. How should I act with Todd Brotzman? How do I make him love me?"

"That's easy. Just be yourself, it will be enough." Dirk quickly leaned into him, kissed his cheek, and walked out of the room. 

Now he had to go up the stairs, quickly, until the very end where the penthouse was. But he could still see in his mind’s eye past-Dirk laying on the bed, in his dark-red trousers and white shirt. Dirk on the day when his life totally changed.

And then he abruptly realised, almost stumbling, that he hadn’t told past-Dirk what he should do to avoid meeting him and Todd! Stupid Dirk, always talking and kissing and forgetting important things! Dirk still ran up the stairs, there was no time to do something else, so... he just had to trust the wise Universe.

Todd was waiting impatiently upstairs in his giraffe mask. He almost yelled when he saw Dirk.  
"At last! Where the fuck-" Dirk interrupted him "You couldn't possibly imagine! Take too much time to explain! Let's run!" and he shoved his gorilla mask on.

Then it all happened very quickly: penthouse totally in order, conversation, shots, kitten with shark ghost in it (but not so ghost-like because it ripped bodies apart and bit through walls), escape downstairs, nineteenth floor - what a relief, there was no Dirk... oh no, he was there, he appeared around the corner. Everything went as they had done then, a week ago. He hadn’t managed to change anything after all.

Well, some things were different. Dirk wasn't as shocked as he was a week ago. He listened with attention, stealthily watched Todd, but still asked some questions. Sly sparks in his eyes, a significant gaze, bitten lower lip - he preferred not to think about it, but... maybe he should try the same with Todd, perhaps it would work? But more important things: three questions, one answer. And the kitten! Quick squeeze of the wrist for goodbye. ‘You are me, you'll manage it, we always do. And even if Todd will never forgive us…’ Well, Dirk has always had himself.

Dirk’s hunch was right, unfortunately - Todd became terribly angry. He literally threw him against the wall, and while he was nervous and wanted to give Todd some explanations, some part of him imagined Todd pressing him to the wall and kissing him, right in front of the surprised face of Spring... Would this or something like this ever happen? Dirk had no hunch about it, and it was distracting.

They went downstairs to the car. No-one was talking anymore. Todd drove the car to a lake near the zoo and stayed sitting in the car while Dirk talked with Spring. Then Todd joined them, so Dirk felt better. But Todd looked so depressed, and like he had suddenly aged. Dirk felt surprised listening to the harsh sentences Todd snapped out, which helped to convince Spring to do what he had do. Dirk felt frustrated imagining what he could tell Todd after all.

"You can't fix everything", said Todd to Spring "Some choices you just have to accept, and try and rebuild as best you can."

Dirk stood behind Todd thinking that he hadn’t manage to fix everything. And he didn't know if was there a way to save his friendship with Todd or if it was ruined forever. 

"Certain things can't be changed", Spring had said before he'd gone, "It's you. It was you all along. It will always be you."

And then he was gone. Forever, for them, but he would meet them again once more, before his death. This time-travelling thing was far too complicated for Dirk’s liking!

They walked along the wooden pier. Dirk rambled about Spring and his life, but Todd was silent, and his silence made Dirk more and more worried. Dirk desperately continued to talk, because he was afraid to stop. Because then Todd could say something terrible, something that would cement the fact that their friendship was ended.

And then when Todd started to talk, Dirk didn't know whether he should he be glad or afraid of it.

Todd was talking about the master key, and saying that everything was happening as they had happened a week ago, exactly. And then:

"You know what, Dirk. I was going to tell you, that you're a monster. That you lied to me all the time. And you ruined my life, just to be with me."

"A monster? Come on, Todd, you're overreacting"

"Now listen to me! And more, Dirk, I was going to tell you that you deserve to be alone."

Dirk was silent, shocked by these words. He listened, jaw clenched and fists balled, trying to keep the inevitable tears at bay. Todd continued, "But then I remembered how me and you spent all week investigating the Spring case, seeking the machine, looking for Lydia. And how you kissed me in that labyrinth..." Dirk opened his eyes wide in amazement, speechless. He did what? "And I realised that I have forgiven you already, although I am still angry. But I think if I were you, if we would... if I would... I would do the same as you, because..."

"Kissed? I kissed you?" Dirk managed to talk again. He knew for a fact that he had never kissed Todd, although obviously he had wanted it from almost the moment they met.

"Oh, Dirk", Todd stepped closer, looking at him earnestly with his big eyes, shaking his head, "I know we haven't talked about it and pretended there was nothing, but..." he put his hands on Dirk's shoulders, looking into his eyes. And then suddenly, Dirk understood everything. He had changed his past with today's meeting with past-Dirk! That Dirk had acted another way after all that had happened today! And now Dirk was in the middle of this paradox. Unlucky Dirk: now he had kissed Todd, but didn't remember it, and never would, because technically it was the other Dirk. Bloody time-traveling!

"Todd", started Dirk. "Dirk, after all this is over, please let's talk about it again, ok?" Todd was standing so close and it seemed he was not so angry. It was a good opportunity. And Dirk didn't like to miss interesting opportunities. So he leaned into Todd and at last kissed him. 

You can never fix everything. The Universe is so complicated, and you will never exactly know which choice would have been better. But everything is connected, and Dirk felt it like no-one else.


End file.
